Look at Joe. He's old. Not only is he old, but he's also a murderer! Murdering is one of Joe's favorite pastimes. Joe had killed thirteen different people in his life, and has just made the fourteenth. But before I tell you about that, let me tell you what Joe had for breakfast this morning. Today he got up and put on his slippers, as some old people do, and went into the kitchen. While still inside the kitchen, Joe managed to rummage out some coffee crystals in a jar from behind a bunch of old cereal boxes. Joe made his coffee hot and black, drank it, and then washed out the skillet he would use to cook his eggs. Joe really enjoys eggs, almost as much as he enjoys killing people. He salted his eggs when he was done, and ate them with toast, as some young people and old people do. Joe's day was looking up! He had had a very satisfying breakfast.

Later that day, he decided that he was going to kill someone. He didn't know who, but somebody had to die. He put on his good hat and his trenchcoat, as murderers sometimes do, and pocketed his favorite gun. He went out into the street. Too many witnesses! He walked around for a bit, maybe got four blocks away from his home, and decided to duck away into an alley. There Joe waited paitiently, humming himself a little tune to pass the time. Somebody with a bag of groceries dropped an orange and it rolled into the alleyway, and Joe finally had his chance. The clumsy victim chased the orange into the alley, and Joe was nice enough to pick it up for him. As Joe was about to hand him the orange, he grabbed the victim and threw him into the back of the alleyway, spilling groceries all over the damp floor. Joe put two brand new holes into the victim, and then he went home as discreetly as possible.

The next day, Joe had a nice breakfast.

Back! Back I say!